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NOT The Time or Place

Screenshot (9) Screenshot (10)
Is setting something to consider when deciding to hash out disagreements? The outcome of many arguments could be different depending on setting and timing.

How ironic that the drama comes to a head at the Women’s Empowerment Network (reality TV sets the stage so often)

On the past episode of Married to Medicine, the ladies attended cast mate Lisa Nicole’s conference. Of course the stage was set when everyone but the infamous Mariah was in attendance. The ladies seemed to be getting along fine, until intermission in the relaxation room. Toya and Dr. Simone’s spat that truthfully shouldn’t have even aired on the show was the first offence in the TRANQUILITY ROOM. Toya should have addressed the situation about Simone dancing with her husband at the bowling alley, but that might have cut Toya’s storyline short. She’s not a doctor, she doesn’t work, she just spends money, even against her own parent’s advice. She doesn’t have anything interesting enough worth filming, so I guess she did the smart move in creating a story. I’m not a fan of their “beef” and really hope that was the last episode hashing out that issue.

When Mariah walks in to the conference late, my thoughts and the thoughts of many viewers were of inquiry. “Why show up? Showing up to bring drama?” She wanted a show from the time she entered the room, the late arrival, the speaking to Quad (appearance of being cordial), sitting next to Quad, and discussing their differences with Dr. Simone. No one asked what was going on between the two, she voluntarily gave information about Quad not holding conversation with her at the table.
I applaud Ms. Quad for approaching the situation to find out what was being discussed. However, it escalated the situation. Can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same. The biggest mistake Ms. Quad made was showing her emotions, showing she was hurt, and cared about her friendship with Mariah. People like Mariah prey on weakness, and at that moment when Quad began crying, Mariah felt high on the throne, and even said so “I will not come down of my chariot…”
ATTN: Ms. Mariah you dethroned yourself the moment you spoke on the situation.

I will give it to her, she has some great one-liners. “I…with Transformers, and especially not Decepticons.” However the comment was directed towards herself. She tried maintaining her composure, but almost had a slip of tongue, wanting to shout out obscenities, and Ms. Quad called her on that!

As I’ve always been a fan of Quad, and she has always been my favorite. I do love the new Ms. Quad. She seems like a more pleasant person, she is genuinely friendly around all of the ladies, and doesn’t have to put on a façade of comfort to prove loyalty to a shady person with a diminutive personality who over compensates for it by projecting “royalty” while her inner hood-rat seeps out.
Definitely tuning in to the next episode to see how this drama concludes.

Just a lil of the TRUTH…

 
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Posted by on May 11, 2014 in Reality Rewind

 

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My Name is _______________and I’m Addicted to Reality Tv

Like there is anything else to watch (especially since Scandal is off season).
(THIS BLOG IS NOT ABOUT THE NEGATIVE EFFECTS SOME OF THESE SHOWS HAVE ON OUR CULTURE & SOCIETY).

Who doesn’t enjoy someone else’s drama. Anytime viewing a situation, and discussing with your girls over coffee makes someone else more famous and lucrative it shouldn’t be viewed as a bad thing…RIGHT??? WRONG!!! People shouldn’t get paid for ignorance. All of us have our guilty pleasures, and for many of us it is Reality TV. Whether you prefer the “Everyday Joe” type of show- American Pickers, Storage Wars; the “Southern Country Living”- Honey Boo Boo, Toddlers and Tiaras, Swamp People, Duck Dynasty; the “Ratchet” – Bad Girls Club, Basket Ball Wives, Love & Hip Hop, Preacher’s Daughters; or the Real Housewives hosted by your favorite city; We begin watching these shows, and can give the run down on each character’s personality, and begin to associate certain things with these characters.

After watching the reunion shows for Basketball Wives LA, and Real Housewives of Atlanta, I called it quits. These shows started to feel petty and ignorant. The rose colored glasses were lifted, I began seeing why criticisms (especially from the black community) were valid. The behaviors of these women were no longer laughable, but shameful. I was determined to wing myself off of these reality shows. As I couldn’t just go cold turkey I would resist the most ratchet shows first. When I sat to think about the shows I could stand to miss, it was almost embarrassing to admit to watching so many. BAD GIRLS CLUB, BAD GIRLS CLUB ALLSTARS, BASKETBALL WIVES, BASKETBALL WIVES LA, BLACK INK CREW, BRAXTON FAMILY VALUES, CHRISSY & MR. JONES, HOLLYWOOD EXES, MARRYING THE GAME, MARRIED TO MEDICINE, LOVE & HIP HOP NY, LOVE & HIP HOP ATLANTA, R&B DIVAS ATLANTA, R&B DIVAS LA, TAMAR & VINCE, TI & TINY, and I’m sure I forgot a few, I only tend to remember them during their season. That was proof that I could bear to stop watching a few at a time.

I felt I could start off by missing the Love & Hip Hop shows. I’d been to a filming of these shows, and was able to seen the editing and direction and the lack of reality in the portrayal of their lives. I also plan on ridding my Monday nights of Basketball Wives, it became a cycle of the same dramatic story with different characters. Unsure of the next show to erase from my DVR memory, but for now I’ll leave the ones that haven’t totally turned me off.

I think my addiction began with Real World, Road Rules, and College Hill. From there each year a new show was added to the list, and from there every evening was consumed with these shows. I’d tweet and text about the different shenanigans of the night, comparing my opinion with others’. My DVR became my reliable friend. Making the viewing of these shows even better because I could skip through the commercials. I’m definitely not putting down those who choose to indulge in Reality TV, but I’m making the effort to turn to TRUE ACTORS in sitcoms, and dramatic series for my entertainment pleasures.

Just a lil of the TRUTH…

 
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Posted by on May 10, 2014 in Reality Rewind

 

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Friends Don’t Let Friends…

Why do friends let each other go places looking any kind of way without advising them differently. Women act as if it’s a crime to express their opinion of their friends appearance. If a mere comment distorts a friendship, was it a true friendship, or a “familiarity” relationship?

Now I’m not talking about those eccentric fashionistas. Everyone is entitled to their own style, those BOHO chic, Punk Rocker, or even Urban wear dressed friends do what they do well. Those who dress in unflattering pieces for their body type should be advised otherwise. I LOVE to see people with different styles, expression or personality differences are what make us human, but some people just look like they don’t know any better. If advice is given and not heeded then you tried…they can never say they didn’t know.

That baby hair? She's not a little girl, she's in her 40's

That baby hair? She’s not a little girl, she’s in her 40’s

That Turtleneck

He was on TvOne and had the nerve to be discussing someone else's fashion faux pas.

He was on TvOne and had the nerve to be discussing someone else’s fashion faux pas.

IMAG1517

I’m no self proclaimed fashionista, but I am a true friend, and when shopping with a friend or getting dolled up for an event, I would hope they advise me on less flattering garments, as I would do the same. If however you are advised, but you like what you have on then DO It HONEY and do it well, but looks are just unacceptable.

Just a lil of the TRUTH…

 
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Posted by on February 8, 2014 in Daily READ, Random thoughts

 

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Idea Execution

“There are a lot of ignorant people in this world”
As an adult I realize what my mother and aunt have been trying to get me to understand my whole life.

There are visionaries and there are executors. Some people have both talents. The best visionaries have no clue how to produce the end result. They have a wealth of creativity, and no knowledge of the steps of the process.

When working on a project, or working in a group there is usually one leader. Some instances several leaders emerge and can become a potential mess! (different blog post). When an idea is born, the brainstorming process is the most exciting. The initial excitement is what gets that ball rolling, but as it takes off, it begins to get complicated. This is when the visionaries who lack leadership skills should take a seat.
Do you have the right to get upset with someone who is leading the idea/project? Do your feelings about the project change? Do you recant your idea and pull out of the process? If you can not be proactive or productive with ideas and details needed to proceed with execution, then be open to input.

This post was inspired by the reality show R&B Divas LA. Singer Kelly Price brought forth the idea of the “Not Yo Mamalogues” to the rest of the cast of the show. For several episodes all the ladies did was discuss what was going to be done. There was no progression on producing a show. Cast mates Chante Moore and Lil Mo spoke with a director and got the ball rolling. When Kelly Price found out about this, she began to lash out at cast mates and the newly hired director. She blamed it on lack of trust, but I believe because she wasn’t driving this project (due to her “busy” schedule) she had a problem. She pulled out of the show, and created unnecessary drama, all because she didn’t take leadership in her vision.

A visionary without leadership skills often times gets frustrated or upset because the leader begins to take charge. The visionary begins to feel as if their idea is being stolen and changed into something different than that which was initially agreed upon. Allow the leader to lead, bring forth the idea, and trust your team to execute said idea. People get hired for these types of things. If you don’t have the ability to execute move over and let someone else drive. If you could do it, it’d get done.

Leadership is as much of a gift or talent as creativity.

Just a lil of the Truth

 
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Posted by on October 6, 2013 in Daily READ, Reality Rewind

 

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Mental Maturity

mature 3 Band geeks, cheerleaders, sport jocks, sexy jocks, drama freaks, smart geeks, smokers, sluts, skateboarders, choir crew, artsy, drunks, gothics, smart jocks, dumb jocks,

My school had them all! I was the type in high school to hang out with a range of people. Never did I have a “crew”. I kicked it with whomever was doing what I wanted to do at that time. I played sports for a while (a week) before deciding it wasn’t for me. I sang in the choir for 3 years, and even tried my hand and cheerleading-switched to dance later and then quit that too. I was just a cool chick (still am). I didn’t need to validate myself by assimilating to a particular group. I didn’t have to hang out in the front hall intimidating people as they made their way to and from class. I did my share of ditching school, cursing teachers and fitting into the typical high schooler.

That being said, my high school reunion was this past month, and let me tell you: it was pitiful.
It was nice to reconnect and make new connections with people from the past. It was cool finding out what interesting journey’s my classmates had embarked on. What was sad was the attitude of a few. Four girls who were seemingly popular the four years of school were dry. They barely spoke, they had STANK written all over their faces. Me being, who I am, spoke to each of them and joined in on the conversation or lack their of. They were very negative in their thinking, and their demeanor gave the impression that they didn’t want to be their. They spoke of how different some people looked. They spoke of how many people were there that they didn’t know. When asked about their “CREW” they responded “They’re at home”. I got the impression that they were their to “spy” on the reunion and report back to their “crew” who felt they were too cool to come. Looking at their behavior was amazing to me. They hadn’t matured mentally in ten years. They were stuck in that “Front hall, cool kid, mean girl” mentality. I laughed inside and out, and moved on to reunite with others.

Watching Oprah’s Next Chapter with black actress discussing the fight it takes to be successful in the movie industry. Actress Gabrielle Union was speaking on how she would rejoice in fellow actresses demise because she saw them as competition. She came to a realization after working with a life coach that being negative about other’s success didn’t help her to grow in any aspect of her life.

This was a direct parallelism to how I felt about the girls at the reunion. They made negative comments about being there, about some of the people there and the different activities that were planned. These comments and feelings could have only made them feel better for the moment, it couldn’t have made them more progressive in life.

The fact that no one really showed up was the first sign that many people hadn’t done anything with their lives, or that they weren’t satisfied with whom they’d become. Possibly ashamed that the energy they put into their high school days left them too exhausted to hit the ground running post graduation. At what point do you gain that maturity? What do you have to see, or go through to understand that bringing down others will never give you internal satisfaction? All in all, one must be content with themselves in order to have peace. Self Satisfaction- regardless of what you are doing, are you happy with who you are?

Just a lil of The Truth

 

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