Tag Archives: dating

Love or Comfort

Is it settling for less if he’s everything you want, but you don’t love him? He treats you like a queen, believes you to be the best ever made, holds you on such a pedestal that even your biggest mistakes seem minimal. Is there better or is that the best? Will you ever actually have the one of your dreams in EVERY aspect of life-looks, style, education, finances, conversation, intellect, personality, goals, interests? Is that having your cake and eating it too? What if he has the looks you like, the personality you connect with, the religion in which you believe, the values and morals in which you agree, but you don’t love him? What else is out there…is there truly that soul connection? Is the soul connection even worth having? Can your soul not connect to your IDEAL mate? Is love all that matters? Can your souls grow a connection? Can you learn to love someone? Back in the OLD days many of them married for status and remained married for years, even married to this day. Now days when people marry their “soul mates” how long do those souls endure??? Does the comfort of life outweigh the comfort of love? If he has all that you desire, its not settling down, its settling up…nevertheless, its settling.
Some marry for love, some marry for comfort of lifestyle…call me greedy, I want both!

Curtesy of Google images

Curtesy of Google images

Just a lil of The TRUTH

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Posted by on October 20, 2013 in Random thoughts


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Rechartered Territory

Attention: SPOILER ALERT!!!!

Not a complete spoil, but this post is about the movie Baggage Claim and the “moral” of the movie.

Those empty days, lonely nights, sometimes drunken, most times sober; You scroll and call, text, or type a simple message to him/her “checking in”. Instantly you become relevant to an ex-boyfriend, old flame, cutty-buddy or boo. “Hey you” “What’s up” “just thinking about you”. So little words with much more meaning. These are the lines thrown out and caught that opens the gate to the past. Our mentality is full of hope for the future, hope for change. Thinking that maybe the relationship will work this time, maybe he/she has matured, or lost baggage that use to get in the way. It’s something all of us have done. Not exactly in the same manner as Montana approached the situation in the movie, but we’ve all ventured back to an “EX” with subtle or unconscious hopes of making this time the one that “Works”.

Entering into conversation which then develops into visitation. Things go good for a while, and then you remember that “thing” that kept you both apart. Even if that issue has gone another seems to emerge, something you just can’t deal with. Trying to rekindle flames with a dissolved wick, drenched wood, or gasless pipe makes your love life a puff of smoke.

How often do we return to what’s familiar to just to be reminded of what we’ve known all along. If it was meant to be, then it would have been. It sounds cliché, but I’m a firm believer in what he/she won’t do, or can’t be, there is someone else ready and willing. You won’t be available to receive it when it does come if you are preoccupied with the past.


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Passing Me By

So I was doing some grocery shopping after church, talking on the phone to my best friend, when I noticed a handsome guy. Not gorgeous, not so sexy, not even REALLY attractive. He was my type though, tall, dark skinned, clean cut hair on top and on his face. His arms were DEVINE! The kind that didn’t need to flex to prove their worth. I did a once over and gathered all of the information I needed. No rig, basked full of beers and other bachelor types of items. He was dressed in a cutoff t-shirt. I quickly got off the phone and grabbed my case of waters. I left the aisle only to glance at him again. I grabbed some milk and continued to glare at him. I made him aware of me noticing him. I thought I was just tripping, so I tried to forget about him and finish shopping. I occasionally glanced around to look for him and couldn’t so I moved on. I wished I would have said something to him but I proceeded to the checkout. Figuring I’d missed my chance as I headed to the car. There he was loading in his groceries. Then again at the light and another light…he smilled at me and checked me out and I made him aware that I knew he was checking me out this time and not vice versa. I turned off to head home, wishing I would have followed him…stalkerish I know.

I’ve been trying to be a different me. The old me would of had his name and number at the first light. I’, trying not to pursue, I’m trying to allow them to pursue me. Guys have it a lil too easy now a days so I decided to miss out on this one hoping that he wasn’t worth it, or if he was then I’d see him again…and just incase its the latter, I’ve memorized the make, model, color and personalized license plate of the car. STALKERISH I know!

Just a lil bit of The Truth…

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Posted by on April 21, 2013 in My Reality Show


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Beholder of Beauty

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”–Tres Cliche

(the term cliche is so cliche it looses it’s own meaning)

Is it just me, or does anyone else notice the Odd Couples floating around lately? I have been seeing couples together that don’t EVEN look like they belong together.  It must be true that opposites truly attract.  I met this nice lady, my age, married, one child, and living a good life.  She dresses cute,modern, and semi preppy, her hair stays done, she’s a lil stuck up, but down to earth.  Well I met her husband, and WOW-straight up thug! Gold grill, Sunglasses at night, and every kind of tennis shoe that dudes buy.  My opinion, she’s too cute for him.  Met another lady, nappy wig, and bucked teeth-no lie.  Met her husband, and Mr. was cute! I started thinking maybe she used to be cute, and had some sort of sickness, and the medicine caused her bodily hair growth.


I just don’t get it! but maybe that’s just the way it goes, one is cute, the other is definitely not! So that makes you wonder…if you are with a handsome man, and you think of yourself as gorgeous, or simply cute…Which one is the ugly one???


Just a lil bit of The Truth…

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Posted by on September 8, 2012 in Our Culture/Our World


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Happily Never After???

So now days, most of my friends are in that FAMILY mode, baby, boyfriend/ /husband.  I notice now that everyone is getting married…at a young age.  I think my 20’s should be spent single, or dating.  Why do people feel like this tender age of mid 20’s is the time to settle down and start a family?  Have they not seen Sex in the City??? I am single, with an occasional date, and loving the freedom, free time and FUN!!! some people just want to feel like they’ve accomplished something I guess. Why not accomplish financial goals, or career goals, or educational goals? So when you return to your highschool reunion at the age of 27 or 28 the scene plays out as follows:

Them: Hey what have you been up to?

You: Oh I’ve been married for 3 years, we have 3 kids, and I work at (enter lame ass job here)—-because you have put no focus on your career, so you must have a lame ass job

Them: Oh really, how sweet

You: How about yourself, any kids?

Them: Nope, just a boyfriend/fiance that loves me and a bangin’ ass job!!! (Snaps fingers and walks away)

You: sit at the table all night sipping Ginger Ale (because you are pregnant with the 4th child) wallowing in your Shoulda, Coulda, Wouldas.


My high school reunion should play out like this:

Them: So what have you been up to?

Me: Working, Traveling, Shopping, Dating,-A little of everything

Them: Oh (Mouth drops open)

People, lighten up, you still have a life to live, you can still have kids up until menopause…they might be healthy then too (pray about it).  All I’m saying is don’t be in such a rush to live out the “American Dream” to the point where you can’t live out your Single Lady Dreams!!!

Just a little of  The Truth


Posted by on August 19, 2012 in Random thoughts


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Cougar Town-The Reality Show

Age ain’t nothin but a number, throwing down ain’t nothin’ but a thang(aaliyah)…Age ain’t nothing but a number, but maturity keeps you sane.(me)

These old ladies eager to get a young man-for what?  They initially concern themselves with the sexual stamina these young men possess.  They want the wild life, the freak show, the fire and desire (my Rick James voice).  They end up getting take to the land of ecstasy on the emotional roller coaster of lust.  Lust-though few admit it-has its own emotional train.

I am fortunate enough to witness a real life cougar in action, live and in living color.  Its’s really embarrassing.  The age difference is 23 years.  These episodes are hilarious, they portray intimate romance, but really its all about those 3 letters S-E-X.  I think it started off that way for them both, but like a woman, she grew feelings, she started caring.  Realizing he is a good guy with good genes, and personality, she fell into her feelings.  Realizing he hoped for kids one day-she was barren, she snapped back to reality.  Realizing she was the same age as his mother and frequented that house often.  She couldn’t be BFFs with her same age mother in law!

Don’t get me wrong, if you are a cougar be one by all means, but realize what it’s about.  The 3 letters, not the 3 words.

Just a lil bit of The Truth!

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Posted by on June 6, 2012 in My Reality Show


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Transitional Stage in Dating

Transitioning from the college scene dating to the real world, regular world dating.  In college, espcially a small college, guys think a little dinner and a little dating is the ticket to keeping the girl happy.  See the opening make a move scene is: “Hey why don’t you come over and we can watch some movies or something.” boom they got you and you sitting at their house every time watching tv and movies.  Then you make the statement about wanting to do something and they realize they gotta get off their butts and take you somewhere…sometimes you get a good college guy with a job who can afford to take you places.  Well, I’m done dating College boys who have goals, but haven’t reached any of them.  I need someone that is social, mentally, and financially compatible with me!!! So you would think the next move would be an older guy.  Well, I met an older guy, and it could be that he’s just too old! He wants to make me happy, spend time with me outside of the house, and cares about my well being.  All good right??? WRONG, his swag is a NEGATIVE! I’m not attracted to him, he can’t dress well enough to be seen with me in public (is that shallow??? so!) He’s not even my type.  I’m trying to give him a try just because I’ve been complaining about the others, but I really can’t do this!  Where is the College Guy Swagg mixed with the Grown Man Swagg…The world may never know!


Posted by on August 22, 2010 in My Reality Show


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